Ambitious. Capable. Clear about what you wanted.
Then you became a mother — and suddenly you don't recognize yourself.
You're stuck between who you used to be and who you're becoming, wondering if you've lost your ambition or if ambition even means the same thing anymore.
Your desire for meaningful work feels in direct conflict with the mother you want to be. It seems like it has to be one or the other.
You have everything you ever wanted but somehow still find motherhood SO difficult, which makes you feel ungrateful and confused.
You wonder why no one told you it would be like this — this complete rewiring of everything you thought you knew about yourself.
You're not meant to survive this. You're meant to understand what's actually happening to you, and that it was never yours to fix.
What you're experiencing has a name: Matrescence: The developmental phase that's a massive identity shift that happens when you become a mother. It's as significant as adolescence, but society forgot to tell you that.
On top of this massive internal shift, you're navigating this transformation in a culture that:
Doesn't value care work
Expects you to be the "perfect mother" while remaining the "perfect employee"
Has systemic biases against mothers built into its foundation
Keeps selling you the myth that you can "have it all" without changing anything, you just have to "bounce back"
But here's what the system doesn't want you to know: This disorienting phase isn't something to survive — it's your invitation to create the life you REALLY want.
The Expert in Personal Development Who Gets Motherhood
Former corporate-ladder-climber at McKinsey and Alibaba. 8+ years of personal leadership development expertise. Studied with Matrescence experts, and, most importantly: mother of three little boys who has navigated matrescence across multiple countries and situations.
"I know what it's like to excel in demanding careers AND navigate the complete identity shift of motherhood. I've been lost in the overwhelm, and I've found the power. This work combines my deep expertise in personal (leadership) development with the lived, raw experience of matrescence transformation."
Here's what nobody tells you: Motherhood IS leadership.
Through matrescence, you're undergoing the exact same personal transformation that traditional leadership development programs spend years trying to create. You're developing emotional intelligence, learning to navigate paradoxes, building resilience, and becoming more authentic — all while your brain has enhanced neuroplasticity that makes this growth faster and more profound than any corporate training.
Being the mom you are, you are already becoming the leader this world needs. You just need to recognize it.
I made you a MAP of Matrescence, that explains why you feel this way, and helps you navigate where you are
Featured in
Business Insider Article: I wanted to quit my business to be a stay-at-home mom
Podcast episode: Motherhood as leadership: transforming through Matrescence
Expert at Wij Parents [Dutch Only]
It really was ground breaking. If I look back on it, it's the most favorite course I probably have ever done. It has been more transformative than the courses I took at Berkeley, Insead and Yale, because you work with my lived experience, and the course provides both an understanding AND the tools for how to actually live a more authentic life.
This journey has made the constant guilt I felt being at work vs. being with my kids go away. Becoming a mother is the best leadership class I had (and I've had many), it just took this course to recognize it.
It was mindblowing. Mother on MY Terms showed me there's a reason for feeling the way I was feeling after going back to work as a new mom. The societal and scientific explanations we learn about bring it all into the picture. It helps you to take a step back and realize what you’ve gone through.
I now see motherhood as an opportunity, as so powerful. What an amazing power we have to create life and be mothers in this day and age. I certainly feel more empowered.
How they created a 'Motherhood on MY Terms'
A director with a decade+ in corporate first gor promoted after the program, and then quit her job to pursue her lifelong passion (and talent): dancing
A lawyer in a high-paced job achieved inner alignment about choosing a 9-5 in law and negotiated 4 extra months of holidays during her transition
A project manager in corporate started her own business on the side to test if the transition fits her
A manager took the GM offer in her company after negotiating her boundaries so sharply she feels comfortable doing this while being the mom she wants to be (including long summer breaks and minimized travel)
A sustainability advisor quit her 14-year high-potential job to take her family abroad on a sabbatical
An ex-CEO turned climate expert chose to take her kids out of childcare and spend significant time with them at home (because she finally realized she's 'allowed' to do that, despite what her environment expected)
A consultant chose to go from 5 to 4 days, and spent 50% of that extra time as pure me-time
A finance leader brushed off an old hobby and attended a sports instruction course, just because it fills her cup besides her job
The full transformation: from understanding what is actually happening to you, to building a career and a motherhood that are genuinely on your terms.
The framework that ends the recurring fights, and builts the foundations for a truely equal partnership. So that love and connection can return. Read more about the root cause of why your relationship doesn't feel equal yet.
Talks, workshops or comprehensive support to retain and develop your mothers and parents.
Yes, especially in the first intense years of motherhood
✨Why now, and not "when the kids are older" The first few years after birth are the most neuroplastic your brain has been since adolescence (Hoekzema et al., 2017, Nature Neuroscience). That's not a deadline. It's an opening. The transformation is already happening to you. The only question is whether you go through it by accident or on purpose. You don't have to figure this out alone.